My name means lady in Greek 

I was named after my Yia Yia Despina

In the dictionary a lady means a well-mannered

And considerate woman with high standards 

Of proper behaviour 

She likes to think of me as that simply worded sentence

A lady who is feminine and elegant 

Doesn’t use the word ‘fuck,’ smoke cigarettes 

Or get high and stay up to watch sunrises 

A lady who is maternal and soft 

Doesn’t start fights, doesn’t skinny dip

Or read feminist literature

A lady who is silenced by the vacuum 

Doesn’t wear pants, hasn’t been to church in years

Doesn’t write poetry about the language 

Her heart taps out in Morse code

I have a cunt, but I’m not a lady 

I relate more with masculinity 

And my Yia Yia is blissfully unaware

Doesn’t know I love women, that I fuck women

And I feel like I’m deceiving her 

Every time I’m in her presence 

And when she asks me if I have a boyfriend 

I say, “No Yia Yia, I just havn’t found the right one yet”

I want to tell her that I’m gay but I say s’agapo instead

And I’ve told my Papou with dementia already 

But it’s okay because I know he will forget it minutes later

I know the news will break my Yia Yia’s ageing bones

And I often wonder what she’d do

If she’d pray for me more than she already does

Or stop asking me to come to church to meet good Greek boys

Or forget that I am her grand daughter entirely 

And I know the only time I will be able to tell her

I see God in my lover’s eyes 

Is when they are lowering her casket into the ground 


Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )


Connecting to %s